You know writing this blog has become kind of a venting place for me and in part it's been therapudic but also very personal. What I may think and feel one day can be resolved the next. So friends who read this blog may wonder what I am whinging about sometimes lol.
I guess I am insecure in many ways when it comes to friendships. I for one, lack a whole lot of self confidence and that in turn affects relationships I have. I get paranoid, I get discouraged easily, and in part it is warranted as my choice of friends hasn't been that great in the past. It's funny how sometimes you end up attracting the kind of people that are exactly what you don't need!
But I've struck it lucky. Found some beauties from amongst all the rubble. I think I just need to be patient and not listen to that negative little nag in my head who says all those terrible things about me to explain why I have no friends (which is not true anyway, I have friends, it's just that voice again telling me I don't). Sometimes they turn up in the most peculiar places. Opportunities come from all angles and can sometimes be overlooked.
I got Chloe immunised on Tuesday and met a lady whom I started a mum's group with through the community centre but ended up not going because it was too much effort and I was too tired from school runs and new bub. Anyway, I've seen her around and in part regretted not making the effort but she was happy to see me and invited me to the next group for the older babies part. I thought it was funny that I had been feeling lonely and then this falls in my lap.
Then there was a mum who told me she enjoyed hanging out with me and wanted to catch up next week. And then my cousin's girlfriend reminded me that she is lonely too and told me to come to their place anytime and vice versa. Maybe putting it out there isn't so bad afterall because it's like the universe took it and dispersed it to the people that would care - either that or they read my whinging blogs lol.
But I say here and now, thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thanks for giving a stuff. Thanks for taking the time. Thanks for caring. Here's to the journey of friendship.